вЂњCory doesnвЂ™t like me,вЂќ I said, looking away from her. Cory canвЂ™t help being an idiot around you. ItвЂ™s just too hot out here.вЂќ I wiped sweat off my forehead with the back of my arm. Taylor leaned over and pushed up my sunglasses so she could see my eyes. The music from MarcyвЂ™s iPod deck was giving me a headache. I took a deep breath and let it out, slowly. I lay back down on my towel, this time faceup. In a low voice Taylor said, вЂњIt was just a joke, Belly.вЂќ Too late, I tried to catch CoryвЂ™s eye, but he didnвЂ™t look back at me. Being mean to Cory was like being mean to a German shepherd puppy. I looked over and saw Katie and Evelyn making whatвЂ™s-her-problem faces, and I felt embarrassed. I shook my head, and he shrugged and retreated back over to the pool. And then CoryвЂ™s smile sort of slipped away and he said, вЂњSorry. My jaw felt really tight, and I could feel all the other girls staring at me. I didnвЂ™t answer him, I just kept my hand on the back of my neck. вЂњBut you looked really hot,вЂќ he protested. He was still laughing, which made me madder. I sat up and glared at him, wiping off my neck. I shrieked and there was Cory Wheeler, crouched down next to me with a dripping Coke can in his hand, laughing his head off. I started to say something else, something nice about the dress, but suddenly I felt ice-cold aluminum sticking to the back of my neck. вЂњOh, yeah,вЂќ I said, but I still didnвЂ™t remember and I knew Taylor could tell. I showed it to you, like, two days ago.вЂќ Taylor let out an impatient little sigh. вЂњYou know, the one with the little polka dots that ties around the neck. I was wearing sunglasses, so she couldnвЂ™t tell if my eyes were open or not anyway. She said, вЂњIвЂ™m going to wear that new sundress I bought with my mom at the outlet mall.вЂќ вЂњI donвЂ™t know,вЂќ I said, turning my head so we were face-to-face. SheвЂ™d lined our towels up close, so it was like we were on one big towel. вЂњI said, what are you going to wear to JustinвЂ™s party?вЂќ Taylor repeated. It was only the second day of July, and already, I was counting the days until summer was over. I was on my stomach, and I could feel sweat pooling in the small of my back. It was eighty-seven degrees already, and it was just after noon. I was friends with Marcy, but the rest, Katie and Evelyn and those girls, they were more TaylorвЂ™s friends. The boys were messing around in the pool and us girls were lying on beach towels, all lined up in a row. Sometimes I closed my eyes and in my head, I said over and over again, It isnвЂ™t true, it isnвЂ™t true, this isnвЂ™t real. What does it mean when someone is really and truly gone? ItвЂ™s like itвЂ™s happening to someone else. When a person you love dies, it doesnвЂ™t feel real. It had been- How many days had it been? How many days exactly?-two months since Susannah had died and I still couldnвЂ™t believe it. Conrad and I werenвЂ™t together, and Susannah was dead. Taylor was snapping her fingers in my face. вЂњHello? Did you hear anything I just said?вЂќ Just like always, Cousins was the only place I wanted to be. Jeremiah jumped in too, and he yelled, вЂњCome on, Belly!вЂќ He winked at me as he came from behind, lifted Conrad up, and launched him into the pool. Then Jeremiah said, вЂњYou guys need to get a room,вЂќ but I knew he was joking. He leaned in, and he kissed me, and his lips were cold and salty from the ocean. Let me see.вЂќ And then he peered at my face in his serious Conrad way. He squatted next to me and said, вЂњI canвЂ™t tell. He said, вЂњYou have words on your cheeks.вЂќ Conrad strode over to me, lifted the sweaty magazine from my face, and grinned. They walked up the steps, cracking up over how Steven had lost his shorts after a particularly ferocious wave. Conrad and Jeremiah came back to the house first. Something romantic.Д¬onrad and Jeremiah and Steven had been surfing all morning. SheвЂ™d probably come out soon with a glass of sun tea and a book I should read. My mother was playing solitaire on the front porch, Susannah was inside puttering around the kitchen. I was lying by the pool with a magazine on my face.

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